Moments
by Irenella Courmett
Summary: Jasper is the married man and famous musician. Sometimes the temptation that comes with fame becomes too much. But what happens when temptation turns into something more? AH. Rated M.
1. Chapter 1

All the Twilight characters belong to Stephanie Meyer.

Moments © Irenella Courmett 2010.

Warning, Rated M.

And thank you to our beta obessedmom for all her hard and great work.

For all pictures and videos check out the link in our profile.

* * *

**Moments**  
**Chapter One**  
**By Crash Hale**  
**Jasper POV**

* * *

"Daddy!" Bella yelled, jumping up and down with her arms reaching up.

I smiled at my little girl and reached down to lift her into my arms, "Whoa, baby, you're such a big girl." She was bigger each time I saw her. And so beautiful. I kissed her cheek and she giggled.

"She's been waiting by the door for the last hour," I heard Alice say and turned to her, offering a smile.

She smiled in return. "I'm making dinner," she said before disappearing into the kitchen again.

"Daddy's got presents for you, baby, let's put them under the tree," I told my youngest.

"Yeah, with all the others! Mama said we can open them with you tonight! Can we really? Really, really?"

"Really, really," I laughed and nodded, walking her into the living room where Alice had the tree set.

I kissed Bella's cheek once more and put her down before I placed the bag of gifts at my feet. I helped her pull the wrapped gifts out and she put them under the tree with the others.

"Dinner!" Alice called.

* * *

"Thank you, Daddy, thank you, thank you!" Bella beamed, throwing her arms around my neck.

I pulled her into my lap and asked her if she wanted me to read her the new book she'd gotten.

"Please," she responded with a nod. My baby was three and just the smartest little thing I'd ever known.

As I read to our daughter, I glanced at the women I loved. She was smiling at us, seeming content but never completely at ease. There was always that hint of sadness in her eyes that she couldn't hide from me.

Even when I tried talking to her she'd stop me, saying she knew it was the way things were and just asked me for whatever I could offer her in that moment.

That's what we were; moments.

I had another life, away from her and Bella. My real life was with Maria and our sons Emmett and Edward.

It killed me when Alice referred to herself and our daughter as my family on the side, because that is how I treated them. That is what they were.

I couldn't give them holidays like I did Maria and the boys. I gave them days here and there, even this was the closest to a holiday - Christmas eve. I knew Maria would give me shit about it because I wasn't home with our boys.

But she didn't know, she didn't know I had two other girls that were my life too. Two girls that I missed every second of every day.

It was wrong to love two women, that I knew, but it didn't stop the fact that I did. Alice just got the worse end of the deal, and she loved me too, which only made it harder on her. Maybe if she hated me she could find someone else to make her happy and give her everything I couldn't.

Someone like that goddam best friend of hers that I knew was in love with her. I hated him, with a passion. He had what I didn't. He spent holidays with my girls and my daughter loved him. She loved her Uncle Jamie. He spent more time with them then I even dreamed of. He had what was mine.

And maybe if Alice pushed me away, she'd see that he wanted more. She'd see that he probably wanted my daughter to call him her dad.

"She's asleep," Alice spoke softly.

I stopped reading and looked to my shoulder to see my daughter peacefully asleep against it. I kissed the top of her head and stood carefully so I wouldn't wake her.

I went to her bedroom and tucked her in. Alice entered and kissed her forehead goodnight and I did the same, turning in time to see her walking away from the room.

I gave Bella another look and sighed. I'd be gone before she woke up, and I'd miss her until I got the chance to see her again.

I walked down the hallway where I knew Alice had gone. She was sitting on the edge of her bed, looking down into her lap.

I closed the door and came to sit beside her, taking her hand from her lap and bringing it to my lips.

_The guys all laughed, agreeing tonight was a good show. I joined in, but our sexy little waitress definitely didn't go unnoticed by me._

_She was stunning, and her voice so sweet when she took our orders. Her smile alone brightening up this shitty little diner._

_I slid out of the booth without anyone stopping me and went to the counter where she was._

_"I'm sorry, did you guys need something else?" she smiled._

_"They're fine, don't worry."_

_"Oh... Okay," she smiled, glancing in their direction and then back to me._

_"Alice, right?" I asked._

_"Right,"_

_"When do you get off, Alice?"_

_She frowned, "Why?"_

_"Wondering if you wanted to join me after your shift?" I offered a charming smile I knew most women couldn't resist. I was a famous musician, most women couldn't resist me even if they tried._

_"And why would I want to do that?"_

_I pulled my eyebrows together in confusion and she tried to hide a big smile. I smiled again too._

_"Oh, you just really do."_

_She watched me for a second before finally responding to my question, "You're my last table."_

_I became cocky, "Always works."_

_"What always works?" this time she seemed confused._

_"Being a rock star," I said matter-of-factly._

_She laughed. She_ laughed_. "Okay," she rolled her eyes._

_"Wait," I held my hand up, "You don't know me?" That would be a first._

_"Nope, sorry, I'm only leaving with you because of your good looks."_

_"Seriously?"_

_"Seriously I don't know you? Yeah." She shrugged, "So, are you going to tell your friends to leave so I can take this apron off or what?"_

_I smiled, still a little stunned and nodded, yelling across the empty diner for them to clear out._

_They all grumbled and a few of the guys gave me the finger but headed out after leaving money on the table._

_Alice reached for my hand and caught me a little off guard, feeling my wedding band. "Married?" she asked._

_"With children," I responded. I know it's strange, but wearing the wedding band rather than hiding it actually attracted more women than it did repel._

_She nodded and pulled her hand away, taking the apron off._

_"How old are you, darlin'?" I asked. She looked young and I didn't need to be getting with someone under age._

_"Eighteen."_

She pulled my hand along with hers as she brought them before her, tracing my wedding band like she had the first night. But so much had happened since then. A lot could happen in four years. And it did. Both our lives changed.

I began seeing Alice every chance I got, leaving Maria alone at home with our twin boys and saying I had a show or some other bullshit.

Alice became pregnant and had our daughter a short year after meeting, and here we were now. Her raising Bella without me. Sharing a night together here and there.

She was just so beautiful and amazing that I couldn't help but love her. I couldn't help but be happy when she placed Bella into my arms a day after her birth. I didn't even mind James' presence that day, knowing he'd been with her when I couldn't. I knew she was scared to give birth and I was glad at least someone was with her to tell her everything was okay and that she did perfectly.

Even though I never saw James again after that day, I knew how close he was to them. I knew because of Bella, because of the way she spoke about him. She loved him too, and even though I wanted her to have all the love in the world, James' made me jealous.

I intertwined my fingers with Alice's, her eyes moving away from my ring and to my face. I shifted us around and she lay back as I moved above her. I pushed her long dark hair from her face and leaned in to softly kiss her lips.

Her fingers tangled themselves in my hair as she spread her legs to help better fit me in our current position.

"God, I miss you when you're not here," she whispered.

I knew how hard it was for her to say things like that so I just nodded, moving in to kiss her soft lips.

"I'm here," I whispered in return.

She moaned into my mouth as soon as I kissed her again, pulling back to push her shirt up her chest.

She broke the kiss, quickly lifting her shirt off to reveal a lacy bra and more of her creamy white skin. She helped me remove my own shirt and I made quick work of her yoga pants.

She lay propped up on her elbows in her underwear while I stood off the bed and got completely undressed. She watched me all the while, laying back when I reached for her panties and pulled them down her legs. She reached behind herself and unhooked her bra, dropping it to the side of the bed.

I grew even harder at the sight of her beauty and moved back over her, kissing her shoulders and chest while I felt up her thighs and she finally hooked her legs up around my lower back.

"I love you so much," I whispered to her, sucking her earlobe into my mouth gently then trailing wet kisses down her neck.

She moaned and pressed her chest up against mine, making me smile as I brought my hands up her sides and took both her full breasts into my hands.

"My beautiful girl," I said against her warm skin, always wishing it to be true.

"Jasper?" Her voice was low and quiet and I nodded with my face between her breasts as I kissed there. "Please, I want you,"

I looked up into her stunning yet sad eyes and moved in to kiss her, reaching between us and taking myself into my hand before rubbing the head up and down her wet core. I pushed into her and groaned as she moaned, her nails digging into my ass cheeks.

I began my long hard thrusts into her while she clawed up my back and held onto my shoulders, moving my kisses down her jaw as she threw her head back.

"I need you," I told her lowly. She didn't understand how much so. I felt a connection to her that was like any other. It was different to the one I had with Maria. I loved my wife, I loved her so deeply and she'd been my world for so long... but then Alice came along and that world suddenly got a whole lot bigger.

Alice whispered, "Faster."

I pulled back from her neck and watched her as I hooked the back of her knees over my arms so I could get inside her deeper and easier than before.

"Oh, god," she threw her head back again, closing her eyes and holding onto my forearms as I started up harder and faster thrusts. "Yeah, there."

Seeing her this way, how much she enjoyed this sinful thing we shared, I pulled her leg up against my chest and kissed her thigh, watching her face as she looked at me for a second before her own hand came up into her hair and she tugged as her whole body shook and she clenched around my length.

This was the only time she ever was at ease around me anymore. I knew it killed her as much as it did me every time I left.

She gave a satisfied smile and made me happy for a second. I wanted her smiling all the time, and hated myself for not being able to ensure that. I was a horrible person. I knew that. I lived with that.

She indicated she wanted her legs down and I complied, giving her a smile when she pushed on my chest and I rolled onto my back so she could be on top. I loved her on top, watching her. I could watch her for days and never tire of the sight.

She pressed her hands against my chest and I gripped her hips, helping her along even though she knew damn well how to ride me and drive me insane. I fought off wanting to come, feeling my dick twitch inside her.

She smiled and leaned down. I wrapped my arm around her waist and brought the other into her long hair as we kissed and I got her into a position where she couldn't move, thrusting up into her as she broke the desperate kiss and breathed against my face.

She came undone again with a small, "Oh, yes," and I followed, unable to hold off a second longer.

My body relaxed as she rested above me, then slowly moved after a second and walked into the bathroom.

I lay there until she returned, slipping a shirt on and new pair of panties. I got off the bed and put my boxer briefs back on too.

"Hey," I wrapped an arm around her waist from behind and kissed her shoulder.

"Hey," she whispered, letting her head drop back against my chest.

"Let's lay down," I said, walking her back to the bed already.

She pulled the covers back and crawled in. I followed behind, pushing her long hair behind her ear and moving in to kiss her. I could never get enough, not knowing how long it would be until the next one.

She held onto me and kissed me back with so much need and want it broke my heart not to be able to tell her I'd always be here. How could I be two people? In two places at once? I needed my boys and Maria as much as I needed my two girls.

Yes, I knew I was the asshole in this whole thing, no matter which way you were to look at it.

"I love you," she whispered against my lips, the kiss continuing.

I held her to me closely and she finally pulled away from this kiss, "Love you too, darlin', always."

She nodded and sighed, "Don't go yet."

I kissed her forehead and pulled her against my chest. "I'm here."

She snuggled into my chest and held onto me tightly. I stroked her hair all along, kissing the top of her head gently every once in awhile until she was asleep.

When I was sure of it because her hold on me was no longer tight, I slowly pulled away, being careful not to wake her when I moved her. She sighed in her sleep and snuggled against the pillow my head had just been on.

I fought not to just say fuck it and stay until morning before redressing and giving her one more kiss.

I left her bedroom and walked back into my baby's room again, kneeling beside her bed and watching my girl sleep peacefully. If angels were real, I knew they'd look just like her. She defined pureness and goodness, no matter what she came from. The things her father did didn't taint her innocence.

She'd grow up into a beautiful woman some day, and I knew she'd hate me for all the wrong I'd done by her and her mother, especially since she'd been born. But for now, she loved me. And I'd love her until the day I die, no matter what happened.

I kissed her chubby little cheek and inhaled her fresh scent, kissing the top of her head next and leaving through her door with a heavy heart.

I made my way out into the driveway and opened the car door, reaching into the back seat and pulling out what I had planned for them.

When I was back inside, by the dinning room table, I placed the large envelope down containing all they'd need - plane tickets, unlimited park entry tickets, the hotel reservations under her name, a letter explaining how I just wanted her and Bella to have some fun at Disney World together and money for whatever she may want or need.

I had an account Maria didn't know about, an account I used to give Alice money every month because I wanted her to live comfortably without having to worry about financial shit. I had the money to provide that for her at least. But I still left her money every time I saw her, just needing to do the only thing I could.

I looked around once more, going over to the fireplace and smiled at all the pictures of Bella lined up. I traced my fingers over the one of her sitting in Alice's lap on a swing at the park before I locked the house up and left for my long drive back home.


	2. Chapter 2

All the Twilight characters belong to Stephanie Meyer.

Moments © Irenella Courmett 2010.

Warning, Rated M.

And thank you to our beta obessedmom for all her hard and great work.

* * *

**Moments  
****Chapter 2  
****By courthale**  
**Alice POV  
**

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* * *

**

**Two Years Later**

I moaned and arched my back as he kept up his slow but forceful thrusts. It was better and better every time we joined together in the most intimate of ways. My eyes clenched shut as I tried to shut out the world around me.

The world where he wouldn't be here when I woke up.

The world where I wasn't his girl.

The world where he never truly claimed his daughter.

Our daughter.

With every whispered 'I love you' I held onto him tighter, desperate to keep this feeling. He was a part of my heart but I could never truly be a part of his.

We came together with a moan and kissed deeply, always desperately. That's all we had - desperation for one another. We were never just content. Our moments were few and far between.

He groaned softly as he pulled out of me, the loss a reminder of what was to come.

Him leaving…

I turned onto my side and closed my eyes tightly. I prayed the tears wouldn't come. At least not while he was still here. He curled himself around me and pressed his chest to my back.

"I wish I could stay." I whimpered softly at his words.

"No you don't," I whispered.

"Alice, don't do this. You know…" I shook my head and pulled away from him. I sat up on the edge of the bed and pulled on a shirt.

I smelled like him. I used to love that feeling. Now it just made me feel cheap and unwanted.

"You better go. Before she realizes you're gone," I whispered and ran a hand through my hair, trying to tame the mess it became in our activities.

All of this would be so much easier if I could hate _her._ But I never could. She was good and perfect. She was a good wife and mother and didn't deserve any of what happened between Jasper and me.

But I'd never regret it.

I got my baby girl. She was something beautiful and perfect in a mess of lies and deception. We may have love but that was no excuse for what we did time and time again. I was his woman on the side and our daughter was his dirty little secret.

"Just go, okay?" I sniffled and wiped my eyes with the sleeve of my shirt. He sighed and sat up on the bed.

"Alice, come here." I shook my head and kept my eyes on my fidgeting hands. I was barely holding on and I couldn't look at his beautiful face or I'd lose all my will not to break down right here and now.

"I can't." I straightened my back and suddenly my sadness and longing turned to anger. "Just leave some money on the nightstand and go. I've done my job for the evening," I whispered harshly.

He stood from the bed and pulled his boxer briefs on, suddenly punching the wall beside the bed and startling me.

"God dammit, Alice!" I jumped at the harshness and stood, turning to face him. "You think this is easy for me?" he asked but I knew he didn't expect an answer. His eyes were dark and he was angry. So angry.

"You think I like lying all the time? You think I like not being able to watch my little girl go to her first day of kindergarten. It killed me knowing she came home from school crying and wanting her daddy so bad that you had to call me while I was at home. It made my heart ache knowing that I have to hide the best part of me.

"It killed me knowing that James was the only one who could calm her down. That's my job! She's my baby. She's mine. You're…" He sighed, running a hand through his shaggy hair. "You can never be mine. That hurts here." He pounded his chest and I brought a hand to my mouth to muffle my cries.

"I love you so fuckin' much it hurts. All of it hurts."

* * *

"We had a f-i-g-h-t last night," I said as I sat on the swing beside my daughter. James was behind us, pushing us both as he usually did. I spelled out the words I didn't want Bella to understand. She didn't need to hear that her father and I were at odds.

I'd known James since I was five years old and he was eight. We knew each other from the neighborhood and he always acted like my best friend, even when he was supposed to think of girls having cooties. He was my rock.

"What happened?" he asked softly, still smiling at Bella as she giggled happily.

"Same that always happens." I sighed and smiled softly as Bella looked over at me.

"What are you gonna do?"

"What I never thought I'd do, but always knew I should."

* * *

_I wish you'd talk to me. I miss you. _

Another text.

I sighed and stared at my screen. It was all variations of the same message.

_He was sorry._

So was I. That's all I ever was anymore. I was tired of feeling so alone in all this. He was gone and I was here. I never made it a choice for him though. I would never make him choose between someone he loved as much as he loved Maria and his boys. I knew he loved Bella with all that he had. Sometimes I even wonder if he'd still be coming around if it weren't for her. Sometimes I wonder if I'd still be in this if it weren't for my sweet girl.

"Him again?" James sat across from me at my kitchen table with a sigh. I nodded and bit my lip, trying to hold back the tears.

"Yes," I whispered brokenly.

"Come here, Alicat." He held his arms out to me and I smiled sadly. I stood from my chair and walked over to him, sitting down sideways on his lap. He wrapped his arms around me and I sighed.

I loved being in James' arms. He was familiar and smelled like home. He was always there for me when I needed him and I loved him for that. He treated Bella like his own and I smiled at the thought of all the times we'd shared.

"It's going to okay. No matter what happens. That little girl taking a nap in the next room will always love you. You'll always have me. I know that's not much." He chuckled and I swatted his chest as I snuggled in closer. "Ow. Okay. Sorry."

"You know you and Bella are my family. I love him. So much. But he's never been here to really be a part of this family." I played with the drawstring from his hoodie as I felt the tears sting my eyes. "I can't do it anymore. The older Bella gets the more confused she becomes."

He rubbed my back gently as he listened. He always listened. I looked up into his ocean blue eyes and bit my lip to hold back a sob.

"Shh." He shushed me and wrapped his arms tighter around me. I cried into his neck as I wrapped my own arms around him. "I'll stand by any decision you make but you do need to think of Bella first," he whispered and ran his fingers through my hair.

"I know. That's why I'm doing this. For her and me, I can't do it anymore," I whimpered softly and he held me tighter.

"I know you love him, but there's got to be something better out there. Something you might not even realize yet," he whispered and ran his fingers through my hair. I sniffled as my eyes closed. He knew I loved that.

"It doesn't feel like it."

* * *

"Come on, baby. What should we do with our Saturday?" I asked Bella with a small smile. I ran the brush through her dark brown curls as she shrugged her small shoulders.

"I can never say the word, mama. The place with the fishys." She turned the page of her book that she had her eyes on, another book from her daddy that came in the mail a few days ago.

"Aquarium? That's a good idea. I'll pack us lunches and we can eat a picnic at the park afterward. Sound good?" She nodded and turned to look up at me.

"Can Daddy come too?" She smiled. "Call him and ask. I'll talk to him. Please Mama!"

"No, baby girl." I sighed and kissed the top of her head. "You know Daddy's busy. He's not even in town." I pulled back and looked down at her sad eyes. She nodded and climbed off my lap.

"Okay, Mama." She held the big book to her chest as she walked to her room slowly.

I wanted to fall apart. I wanted to just cry and never crawl out of this hole of uncertainty. This whole thing only made me see that it wasn't healthy to keep doing this.

Jasper and I were selfish to keep doing this to her. She didn't need to be so unclear of where she stood with her own father.

"I have to let you go," I whispered to the small picture that was on the table beside the couch. Jasper stood there with his arm around my waist and Bella on his hip.

"Ready, Mama."

* * *

We walked through the aquarium hand in hand. Simple moments like these were so easy to lose myself in. I could almost forget the nagging feeling in the back of my mind while I just spent time with my daughter.

She was so perfect and carefree that I couldn't help but smile back at her. She made the funniest face at the silly fish that swam by and giggled as they swam towards the glass.

"Look, Mama! His hair is like Daddy's!" She laughed and pointed to the slight Mohawk on the fish coming towards her. I chuckled softly to myself and nodded, the ever-present ache in my chest flaring slightly at the mention of him.

"He does." She smiled brightly at me and then turned her attention back.

We walked a bit further before my phone rang. I kept a hold of Bella's hand as she looked at the eels. I dug my phone out of my purse just in time and answered it quickly.

"Hey, beautiful." James smooth voice came over the phone. I smiled as I felt some of my anxiousness melt away.

"Hey, James. What are you up to?" I asked with a small smile as I kept an eye on Bella.

"I got off work early and wanted to see how my girls were doing. Want to meet me for lunch?" I looked to my watch to see it was already almost one o'clock.

"Sure. Bella and I packed lunches to take to the park but we can do whatever." I kneeled beside Bella and smiled at her.

"Who's that?" she asked as her fingers stayed against the glass.

"James," I whispered and produced a tissue from my purse, wiping her runny nose. She scrunched her face and giggled.

"Jamie!" she yelled towards the phone. I heard his soft chuckle and rolled my eyes at my daughter and poked her belly. She laughed and held her arms out to me. I picked her up and began walking towards the exit.

"I'll pick up something at the deli on the way. The park close to your house?" he asked as I heard the car door shut.

"Yeah. We'll see you in a few." We said our goodbyes and I hung up.

"Uncle Jamie is going to eat with us at the park. Sound good, baby girl?" She nodded and put her head on my shoulder. I held her tight to me.

* * *

"I made you a peanut butter with grape jelly, just like you love." I smiled at my daughter and her answering smile was perfect.

"Hey, ladies," James called from his car. He jogged towards our table with a smile. I bit my lip and waved while setting out Bella's and my food.

"Jamie! Sit by me. Mama, can you sit over there? I want Uncle Jamie by me. I haven't seen him since Tuesday!" She pouted at me and I shook my head.

"All you had to do was ask, baby." I kissed the top of her head and made my way to the other side of the table. James kissed my forehead before making his way over by Bella. She wrapped her arms around his neck as soon as he sat down. I laughed softly.

"Did you guys have fun?" James asked as Bella moved into his lap. She moved to open his bag and I tsked.

"Bella, that's rude. That's James' food." I scolded and shook my head. James smiled at me as Bella shrunk back against his chest. He'd learned long ago that he shouldn't undermine me so he always just sat back as I disciplined her. He had to do his fair share as well. Bella was stubborn little girl.

"So, did you have fun, Bella-bean?" he asked and combed his fingers through her hair. She nodded as she bit into her sandwich.

"We did." She swallowed the bite before speaking again. "We saw this one fish that looked like Daddy. He had his hair!" She laughed and smiled over at me and I nodded.

A look passed over James' features that usually did whenever Bella mentioned Jasper before it disappeared and he smiled.

"That sounds funny, sweetheart." He chuckled though it almost sounded forced. I knew he hated Jasper.

It was inevitable for him to hate the person he thought had put me in this situation. But what James didn't realize is that I put myself here.

But I'd never take back any of the choices I made.

All those moments led me to this spot right here.

With my baby girl and best friend.

If I wanted my future to get straightened out I needed to let him go. It would hurt like hell and I'd probably be alone forever but I would never take it back. He'll always be a part of me. Every time I look into my little girl's eyes I'll see the best parts of him.

With a sad smile I looked over to the two most important people in my life and my resolve was strengthened.


	3. Chapter 3

All the twilight characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Moments © Irenella Courmett 2010.

Warning, Rated M.

And thank you to our beta obessedmom for all her hard and great work.

For all pictures check out the link in our profile.

Thank you to Brittany, Jessica, and Christina for the help with translating.

* * *

**Moments  
Chapter 3  
By Crash Hale  
Jasper POV**

**

* * *

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"_Quieres que llame a tu papá?_" (_Do you want me to call your dad?_) Maria threatened our boys, standing before them with her hands on her hips, looking totally cute and not at all intimidating.

Both Edward and Emmett looked to the floor. "No, Mamá, we're sorry," Edward replied.

She sighed and shook her head, then suddenly smiled when she turned and saw I was home.

"Hey, darlin', these two givin' you a hard time today?" I asked, wrapping my arms around her from behind and pressing her firmly to me. I placed my chin on her shoulder and winked at my boys.

They looked at us with totally innocent faces and I laughed. They were good boys, but still boys never the less. They had the energy to drive us both mad sometimes.

"No, they're okay," she said, resting back against my chest and placing her hands onto my forearms. "How was it at the studio?" she asked.

"You know, same old, same old," I shrugged, "We gotta go out of town tomorrow for another recording though," _I'm going to see Alice,_ "It'll only be a day or two, I'm not sure."

She groaned, "You can go outside, but be good this time," she told the boys. "_Cena en una hora!_" (_Dinner in an hour!_) she called after them.

They both yelled an, "Okay," before she turned in my arms and pouted up at me, "I know you have a demanding job and the band is like your second family, but I just hate it when you have to leave your real family. We miss you so much when you're gone." she told me, pushing my long hair back and looking at me with as much love as she did when we were sixteen.

_Second family._

I had a feeling it was about to be ripped away from me and that's the only reason Alice wanted me to come and speak to her about something. I was scared shitless of losing them, but I had a feeling it would come someday. We couldn't just continue this forever. Alice often told me how Bella always asked for me, how she missed her daddy. And it killed me that I just couldn't be there for my baby.

I didn't want to lose them, and that was selfish. But the best thing for them would be for me to lose them_. _That, I knew was the truth. I still didn't want it though. I needed my girls. The one in my arms this moment and the two who didn't spend enough time in them.

"I know, you know I hate leaving you," I sighed, leaning down to kiss her lips gently. She was so amazing. She never let me give up on my dream or called it bullshit. She stuck with me, even though I was away for almost half the year touring and doing other work related things.

We had met when she moved to Texas during junior year. The moment I saw her I fell in love. Her father was American and her mother Mexican, giving her a perfect combination of tanned skin, pretty brown eyes and beautiful light brown hair, her body small and fucking perfect. She was stunning, and although every guy in school was after her, she chose me.

Her mother was big into family and culture, so Maria spoke fluent Spanish, making my dick hard even now when she spoke to the boys in it because she wanted them to learn too.

I didn't deserve her. She was the perfect wife and an amazing mother to our sons.

She gave another pout and squeezed me to her, my hands dropping down to her ass, "I'm gonna make dinner, wanna help?"

I nodded and slapped her ass as she turned. She laughed and ran from me playfully.

Maria and I worked on dinner together, my mind far away while thinking of what Alice was making Bella to eat tonight. Was James there with them? Were they alone? Were they out?

God I missed them. There wasn't a moment that went by that my heart wasn't breaking because of their distance. And not just the distance that could be fixed by getting into a car.

Maria kissed my back while I made the salad, slipping her arms around my waist.

"You okay, papi?"

"I'm great, darlin', I'm with you."

She hummed, "I'm gonna get Em and Edward."

She did, and the four of us had a nice family dinner. I watched the boys and smiled, wondering how we'd produced such different kids in a set of twins. Emmett was loud, funny, and goofy and Edward was proper, quiet, and a little shy. They were both good boys, and I hoped one day they wouldn't grow up to do the same thing to the women they loved that I was doing to their mother.

I offered to take them to the movies after dinner and they cheered. Maria decided to stay home, saying she needed some time to relax. I nodded and kissed her goodbye, knowing she did a lot and hardly ever got a minute alone without anything to do. She took care of the boys, and the house, and kept up with almost everything in our lives.

We got ice cream after the movies and hung out there while we ate. When we arrived home, they got ready for bed and Maria and I made sure they were in their rooms. They were seven and had their own rooms since the house was big enough.

Again, I provided them with the best money could buy, because I needed them to know they meant so much to me. Maria didn't like that I spoiled them like crazy, but I couldn't help it that they clearly loved it. I mean, why not? I could afford it easily.

"_Buenas noches mi ninos._" (_Goodnight, my babies._) Maria called out to both open bedroom doors before she and I walked back downstairs.

Maria grabbed the remote and began watching whatever it is she watched. I sat beside her on the couch, lounging back and pulled her into my side. I kicked my feet up onto the coffee table, and since she was so much smaller, she placed her feet on top of my legs, snuggling into me closer.

I kissed the top of her head and inhaled the warm sugary smell she always offered. Her shampoo reminded me of my mama's brown sugar cream of wheat and whenever I smelt it, I remembered a time I was young and innocent, so damn long ago.

I wasn't anyone for my mama to be proud of anymore.

I kept my eyes on the television, but didn't actually watch, just letting her enjoy the program. When it was done she kissed my cheek and moved her lips to my ear, "Papi?" she whispered, her hand slowly moving up my thigh to my hardening dick.

"Yeah, baby?" I whispered back, moving my hand to the side of her neck and rubbing circles with my thumb.

"_Te amo_,"

I turned so our noses were touching. We moved around until I was on top of her and she was spread out on the couch.

"I love you," I told her, feeling down her slender waist and kissing her neck. "I always have."

She moaned, feeling my back and holding me close to her. "Then take me up stairs and fuck me."

My sudden movement caught her off guard and she giggled sweetly as I threw her over my shoulder without any effort at all.

We were a floor above the boys so we didn't have to be quiet like we did when they were younger and sleeping right next door. Maria talked dirty in Spanish, knowing it drove me insane.

Over the many years she and I had been together, I learnt what a lot of it meant. But I sucked at speaking it so just stuck to English. She loved my southern accent anyway and admitted I sounded goofy when I tried to speak Spanish.

My wife pushed me to the bed as soon as I placed her down, removing her clothes so I could watch.

I pulled my t-shirt up and cover my head quickly, throwing it to the side and watching her strip. She straddled my lap, throwing her long hair back and leaning down to kiss me.

Sex with Maria was still hot. She was exciting and fulfilling, even during the pregnancy and shortly after. The problem wasn't that my wife neglected me sexually. She wasn't the problem at all.

I was. I suddenly found myself famous with the world at my feet, different women throwing themselves at me every night. I wasn't strong enough, or good enough, to say no, and it soon turned into me pursuing women rather then just them offering it up.

It was fun and exciting.

And then I met Alice and it became serious. I found a girl I would so clearly follow like a puppy if Maria was never in the picture. It was like our chemistry was perfectly matched. I'd be with her in a split second if I hadn't already promised myself before God and all the people I loved to my high school sweetheart, to the kindest woman I knew.

She rubbed against my covered erection while grinding me and I squeezed her perfect ass, making her moan.

"Get on your hands and knees, darlin', and put this up in the air for me," I told her, slapping her ass on the word "this".

She pressed her naked chest to mine with a moan, waiting until I smacked her ass once more before doing as I told her.

It was a good thing she liked it rough, because half the time I couldn't stand myself when we made love and I looked her in the eye, knowing that she trusted me with everything she was. She'd never take me for a cheater. She thought I was the greatest man in the world and often spoke of how lucky she was to have me.

I felt sick to my stomach.

Maria did a perfect job of spreading her knees and leaning forward on her chest, indeed sticking her behind out to me and waiting.

I took a deep breath and unbuckled my jeans, stepping to the bed and gripping her hips so I could pull her closer to the edge.

I ran my fingers over her wet slit, rubbing her as she pressed back against my hand, her back arching even further.

I used my free hand to feel up her back, my white hand contrasting against her naturally tanned skin as I tasted her off my fingers.

I stroked myself a few times before thrusting into her without delay. I listened to her whimper and watched as she gripped onto the bedspread for dear life, fucking her as hard as I could until she pulled forward and tensed with a light scream.

I kissed her back and whispered an, "I'm sorry," I tended to get carried away without giving her a break.

She hummed, taking deep breaths and relaxing into the bed. I turned her over, spreading her legs and kneeling between them so I could reach between her legs and slip two fingers in, making her come with only three strokes.

As soon as her high was down I entered her again, holding her legs to the side and kissing her neck until I joined her in her second orgasm.

"Fucking love this pussy," I grunted against her ear and she moaned.

"And it fucking loves your dick," she responded exhaustedly.

I chuckled and rolled over, staring at the ceiling as guilt washed over me once again.

* * *

I entered the house as I always did, feeling my heart drop when my daughter wasn't there waiting for her daddy. It meant she wasn't home. It meant things were not good at all.

I heard water running from the kitchen and entered, seeing Alice was washing a few dishes - keeping herself busy it seemed.

"Hey, darlin'," I said, wrapping an arm around her and kissing the side of her head.

She sighed and turned the water off. "Hey."

I frowned and pulled away so she could turn around, but trapped her between myself and the sink so she wouldn't leave.

"Where's my baby girl? Daddy got her some new books." That child loved reading and being read to. Her own books would be out one day. I just knew it was in her future. She'd be the most amazing person and make us both proud - she did already.

"Not here," she whispered, pressing on my chest and stepping aside.

"What do you mean _not here_? Where?" I asked, freaking out internally, but it managed to slip out in my tone also. "Where, Alice?" I wanted to see her, dammit. I dreamed about it when she wasn't in my arms and Alice had never been one to deny me my child.

"We need to talk, alone, without her here," she explained.

I sighed and advanced to her again, bringing my hand up to gently cup her cheek. She was so, so beautiful. So, so, sad and broken.

How could I break something so precious and perfect?

How could I be such a monster?

"Baby, we had a fight, but you know I'm sorry. I didn't mean to yell at you. Please, Alice," I pressed my forehead down against hers and actually heard her swallow.

This wasn't like the other times she'd get sad and I'd get angry because I couldn't give her and Bella what they needed. The air was thick and everything felt like it was about to come crashing down.

"Jasper."

I leaned down to kiss her, confused when she pulled back quickly and held her hands firmly to her sides.

"She's with James." I went back to answer the question she'd refused to. "My girl is with him."

Alice nodded, "Yeah, she's with James, and she's fine. Please just... I just need to talk to you," she told me defeatedly, her green eyes begging now.

I ran my hand over my face, tired from the travel and the obvious bad news I was about to receive - bad for me, but good for her. Good because we both knew it's what she needed.

I took her hand and she let me. "Let's sit," I suggested, leading her into the living room. We sat quietly, holding hands as she looked at them and I looked at her face. Her eyes were bloodshot, either from crying or not sleeping, either one wasn't something I liked putting her through.

"I missed you," I told her, taking one of my hands from hers and cupping her cheek.

She nodded but continued to avoid my eyes.

"I am sorry... Talk to me," I wanted to kneel before her and beg, but figured that wouldn't make it easier on her.

"I'm... We can't... We can't keep doing this to Bella."

I swallowed. Here it came. I knew it would someday. I just didn't like thinking about it.

She finally looked at me, "It's been, what, over six years?" She shook her head. "I mean, it wouldn't have even lasted this long if it wasn't for the five Bella's been in the picture. This isn't about us anymore, Jasper. It's about her and we're confusing her to no end. You're here maybe two times a month, sometimes three, and we need... _she_ needs... either everything, or nothing."

I dropped my hand back to hers and held it tightly. I heard a sharp intake from her and looked up to see she'd started crying.

"I feel like a horrible mother asking her father to leave, but I am, Jazz... I just _can't_ anymore. I don't know what to say to her when she asks for you. I th-think it would be better if you just... went away and she forgot."

She was right. Bella was young. She'd forget all about me and live a normal happy life. I on the other hand, would never ever forget.

"I love you, you know, it's not just about Bella. It's you. It's her. It's the both of you." Even without Bella, I'd still love Alice. It was just the way things were.

She sniffled and shook her head, "I'm not going to ask you to leave your wife and your boys. I'd never, but I am asking you leave us. Just, stop everything you're doing and be good for them... I can't stand feeling so guilty anymore... Over, just _everything_... What I'm doing to Bella, to your family if they found out."

She stopped talking and stared at me as my tears began to reflect hers. This was it. She got the courage to do it and I wouldn't do what I wanted - I wouldn't beg - because I knew not to. I knew leaving would be the best thing for them.

"And I'm not one of those girls that says one thing and wants another. This isn't a time you're meant to do the opposite of what I say."

"I know you're not that girl," I whispered. She always meant it. She meant every word.

"You're amazing. Bella's lucky she has such a strong mom. You're gonna be great, baby," I cried, trying not to so it wouldn't be so hard for her.

I pulled my hands away though, not able to take it and wanting to hide my loss and weakness from her. I covered my face and pressed my elbows into my knees, taking deep breaths only for them to escape in shattered broken breaths.

She sat quietly next to me, being careful not to let herself get sucked back in like I'm sure she wanted. I saw it in her eyes and heard it in the way she spoke that she wanted me to hold her forever and be here, if things were different.

"I'm sorry," I said. "I'm sorry I'm such a fuck up and did this to you." I managed to get out.

"Don't... Just don't, okay? I know."

I looked back over as she sniffled.

"You know if you ever need anything though, I'll always-"

"No," she cut me off and I frowned. "Nothing. No contact. If I'm going to do this, I can't have anything connecting me to you anymore. I need to do this my way, or it won't work and I'll just end up... I'll end up wanting you again."

I pulled her into me as her sobs took over her again, her body shaking against mine as she clung to my shirt.

"Please, promise?" she asked into my chest.

And just like that, I promised her the hardest thing I'd ever have to keep. "Promise."

"Please go now?" she whispered.

Of course it hurt, and I was only doing it for her. Finally for her.

As soon as she pulled away from me, I stood and took a deep breath. "Just so you know, not one day will go by that I don't think about her, or how much I love her. If you need money, or anything, please, Alice, know that I'm good for that at least."

She wrapped her arms around herself as she stood to walk me out and shook her head, "I won't."

It cut so deep that only I could feel it. And I gave her one more look before turning and going for the door. I opened it slowly and stepped out, my chest feeling like it was tearing.

With another dozen or so steps, I was leaving half my heart behind, and it would always be where Alice and Bella were. No matter what. She may find and love another man, and he may raise my daughter, but they'd always own my heart.

"Jasper."

I turned, not expecting she'd follow, and she ran into my arms in tears.

I closed my eyes and leaned my head down to smell her hair. She and Bella had the same kind of freshness to them, and that just made me break down all over again. I'd never see my baby again.

I tried to shush her as I smoothed out her hair and kissed the top of her head.

"I'm tired of being sorry for everything all the time," she told me into my chest.

I knew what she meant. She and I were one big sorry after another. We loved each other, and we were sorry. Not for having Bella of course, but for the rest that couldn't be changed.

I cupped her face and leaned down to kiss her one last time, remembering the way her soft lips felt on mine, slightly salty from her tears.

"No more sorrys, you're gonna be fine now," I told her. She was right not to want to feel sorry for her life anymore. She was right in wanting things to be normal, and she was right in knowing that by eliminating me, there'd be less sorrys and more normal.

"I love you,"

"I love you. Take care of our baby."

"I'll love her for you too," she offered.

I smiled through my tears and kissed her cheek, "Thank you."

I felt like dying.


	4. Chapter 4

All the twilight characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Moments © Irenella Courmett 2010.

Warning, Rated M.

And thank you to our beta obessedmom for all her hard and great work.

For all pictures and videos check out the links in our profile.

* * *

**Moments****  
Chapter 4  
****By courthale  
James POV**

**

* * *

**There's moments in life where you look at yourself and wonder what you could've done different. Could I have made the baseball team if I had just tried harder? Could I have gotten a scholarship because of it? Could I have a better job? Could I be making better money? Etc. Etc.

You want to know my moment?

My moment was the day Alice met Jasper.

I feel like some sort of stalker for even admitting this but I was there that day. I had found this lady who was giving out some flowers on the corner and got some for Ali. I wanted to surprise her.

I pulled up just as she was supposed to get off her shift and saw her exit with him. They were laughing and holding hands and I just felt my whole world shift.

She'd only ever given me that smile. It was carefree Alice. That was my Alice.

Ever since that day I knew I was doomed to live my life pining for my best friend. She was beautiful inside and out and she didn't even know it. My whole life was based around this one person who made me feel so complete and she didn't even notice.

I sighed as I watched her climb into his car.

I missed my moment.

* * *

"Hey, Bella bean." I whispered as she climbed into my lap. She snuggled into my chest and her tiny hands made fists in my shirt. "What's wrong, sweetheart?" I rubbed her back gently.

"Hard knocks, Jamie. Hard knocks," she said with a yawn. I chuckled and held her tighter to me.

"Do you even know what that means?" I ran my fingers through her soft hair as she shrugged.

"Nana Brandon says it all the time." Her eyes fluttered closed and I looked towards the clock.

7:45

"Close to bed time, sweetie." I kissed the top of her head as she nodded into my chest.

"Read to me, please?" she yawned. I smiled and nodded, standing with her still in my arms.

* * *

But then you have moments that make your life worth living. The day you meet your first love. The day you graduate at the top of your class.

That moment for me was the day Isabella Marie Brandon was born.

She may not be my blood but that never made me love her any less. I was there the day she was born. I held Alice's hand as she pushed. I wiped her forehead and fed her ice chips as she grunted through the pain. The idea of childbirth had always freaked me out but with Alice it was so natural and beautiful.

Alice passed out soon after. She was exhausted after two days of labor. The doctor handed Bella to me with a smile and I nodded, taking the small pink bundle into my arms.

"Hi there," I spoke softly. She cooed and her eyes blinked open as I ran my finger down her cheek.

I found my way to the rocking chair in the corner and held her until they took her away from me. I sat in that same chair as Alice slept. I'd occasionally reach over and brush some of her soft hair back. She'd sigh and lean into my touch.

I loved her so much.

But she never saw me…

* * *

I kissed Bella's forehead as she slept and made my way quietly from her room. Alice was sitting on the couch as she worked. She had found a job as a medical transcriptionist after she broke it off with Jasper.

It had been a year since that day. I was beyond elated that she was finally opening her eyes to see that he wasn't good for her or Bella. But at the same time I saw how much it broke her heart not to be with him.

It killed me to have to be the one to hold her as she cried for him. I had to hear all about how much she loved and cared about him. I watched her as sleep finally took her. She was exhausted after all the crying.

I was the one who helped her financially. She worked hard for all that she and Bella had now. She cut him off from them completely and I was shocked when she told me he was no longer providing for them.

I eventually moved in with them as the bills became too much. I had the money and resources to help and I did anywhere she'd let me. I was here all the time anyways so it just made things easier.

Besides, Bella needed a full time father figure in her life. I was more than happy to fill in the role. I'd never replace Jasper but I'd do my hardest to prove to that little girl that life wasn't full of disappointments.

"Hey, beautiful." I leaned down and kissed her cheek, setting the glass of wine on the coffee table in front of her. She smiled at me gratefully and took a small sip.

"She was so tired after today." She slouched back against the couch and took off her reading glasses. I smiled at the sight and moved from my chair.

"Scoot up." I told her and sat behind her after she moved away from the couch. I placed my hands on her shoulders as she leaned back against me. She moaned softly and I breathed deeply to keep my body under control at her noises.

It physically hurt to be this close to her and never be close enough.

* * *

Then you have moments in your life where you realize you're just as bad as the rest of them. You lie to your best friend about sleeping with his girl. You steal from the corner market. You say hateful things behind the back of someone you care about.

The one for me was when I began sleeping with Victoria.

It wasn't that she was a bad person or even that she wasn't good for me. It was just that I had all these feelings for Alice and I was leading on this perfectly innocent person who had done nothing wrong.

"I love you, James." My body stiffened at her words. We were both lying on my bed naked and wrapped around one another.

"Victoria… I…" I closed my eyes as my throat went dry. She sighed and sat up. She pulled the sheet up over her chest as she turned to me.

"Why don't you just tell her?" She ran a hand through her long red hair. I sat up against the headboard and looked at her with a frown.

"What? Who?" I shook my head, confused.

"Alice. It's so obvious. I don't know why I thought that I'd be able to be some kind of a replacement for her." She stood and dressed quickly. She made her way to the door as I watched her with wide eyes.

"You're leaving?"

She stopped at the door and spoke with her back to me, "Don't let what happened with me happen again. At least not without telling her first."

That was the last day I saw her. I felt like shit for days after. It was so obvious when it was someone I actually tried to hide it from, but with Alice she never saw.

* * *

"You almost done for the night?" I asked as I buried my nose in her hair, breathing in her scent deeply. She sighed and leaned even more into me.

"Yeah. I can finish tomorrow. They don't need them back until Monday anyway." She shrugged, moving away from me to stand.

I leaned back against the couch and ran a hand through my hair. I leaned my head back and closed my eyes.

"You okay?" she asked softly and sat next to me on the couch. I shrugged, keeping my eyes closed.

"Yeah. Just…" I stopped, my need to tell her spiking and making my chest tight.

"Just what, James?" She frowned and moved closer, folding her legs beneath her.

"Victoria broke up with me a few weeks ago." I let my head loll forward to look at her. She reached over to take my hand in hers.

"I'm so sorry, James. I never liked her anyways. You could do so much better…" She started on her normal speech after one of my relationships failed. I held up a hand and stopped her.

"No. It was all my fault." I shrugged and looked over to Alice, my eyes focusing on hers as I brought forth all the courage I could muster. "I'm in love with someone else."

"Who? Do I know her?" She tilted her head slightly and raised a brow. "You've never used the word love, James." I saw a brief emotion pass through her eyes and prayed that it was some sort of response to her thinking I'd be with someone else. Jealousy maybe.

"Yeah. I'd say you do, beautiful." I moved closer to her, reaching up and cupping her cheek. She leaned into my touch as she always did but then pulled away as she looked into my eyes.

"What?" Her eyes went wide as she registered what I was really saying. "No. No. No. James you can't love me. I'm broken. I'm not good enough for you. You're amazing and perfect. I'm just… not." She stood, moving away from me and began pacing in front of the fireplace.

"No you're not, Ali. You're perfect. I've always loved you, beautiful," I confessed. If I was going to do this then I'd go all the way. "You're the reason I wake up every day. You and that little girl in the next room. You guys are my whole life." I stood and stopped her pacing by pulling her back to my chest.

"Stop. I'm not good." She pulled away from me and turned to look at me. "You deserve… so much. I'm just not whole. I'm so very broken, James."

I moved forward and took her face in my hands. I rested my forehead against hers and whispered my plea softly.

"Just try. Please, beautiful. Just try loving me. I'll do anything. Please," I begged, my voice strained to my own ears. "I can't be him. I'm so sorry I can't be." She whimpered and her arms wrapped around me.

"I would never want you to be. You're perfect." She breathed in a shaky breath.

"I'm not. I'm flawed. I've loved the same woman since I was 8 years old and never had the courage to tell her. That's not perfect." I reached up and brushed aside the tear that fell from the corner of her eye.

"I do. I do love you." Her arms tightened around me as my body moved of its own accord.

One hand tangled in her hair as I tilted my head. She moved with me and suddenly her soft lips were on mine. I sighed before I knew what I was doing and my tongue snaked out to touch her lips. It traced her lower one and I moaned. Her taste was better than I could've imagined.

"I love you…" I said the words softly, letting them linger in the thick air around us. She moaned quietly and tangled a hand in my hair.

"Just kiss me." She smiled. Her mouth opened and my world exploded. Her tongue touched mine and it was magic.

She tasted like candy and red wine and home and familiarity and perfect.

"MOMMY!" We broke apart as we heard Bella's voice break through our haze of lust and love.

"Yes?" Alice answered, her voice slightly higher than normal. She cleared her throat and I chuckled softly. She shot me a glare and I stopped. She smiled and rolled her eyes before looking back to the hallway where Bella emerged.

"I just thought of something awesome!" She was in her Dora PJ's and her hair was a mess.

"What are you doing up, sweetheart?" I asked and knelt down as she moved to us.

"I just had an awesome dream!" She smiled and looked to us both. "And it gave me an idea."

"What is it?" Alice asked as she sat down beside me.

"James has no daughter, right? I have no daddy, right? Why don't you just be my daddy like all the other kids have? In my dream you were my daddy and I called you Daddy." She smiled wide, so proud of herself for this epiphany.

"Bella…" I stopped as my emotions became almost too much.

She threw her arms around me and was almost jumping, as she held on tight.

"Please say yes. Please say yes," she whispered into my ear. I wrapped my arms around her and looked over to Alice.

"If anyone has a right to claim her as your own, it's you, James." She bit her lip, one tear falling from her eyes. "It's always been you," she whispered.

* * *

And finally, you have moments that make you believe that you truly do deserve to be happy. The good, the bad, the shit, all of it was worth it because it brought you to the point you're at. I took a chance and it brought me the best thing of my life.

My moment finally came…

It came in the package of one small 6 year old and my best friend.

Moments eventually become a jumbled mess called life.

This was mine.

My life with my best friend, lover and confidante.

My life with my little girl, and daughter.

* * *

_I have a small request, if you're interested - please check out a couple of my new one shots (House of Candy and Second Time Around) and my entry for the Me & Mr. McCarty Contest (Later). You can fine them on my profile - username Crash Hale. The link to my profile in our profile. They need some of your love. - Thanks!_


	5. Epilogue

All the Twilight characters belong to Stephenie Meyer.

Moments © Irenella Courmett 2010.

Warning, Rated M.

And thank you to our beta obsessedmom for all her hard and great work.

For all pictures and videos, check out the links in our profile. And be aware, this chapter may very well freak a lot of people out but we sure did have fun messing with it. We hope you see the humor and tragedy in it. And as you will tell, we left it open for you to think what you will.

* * *

**Moments  
****Epilogue  
****By courthale and Crash Hale  
****Bella POV**

**

* * *

**

Bella, age eighteen...

I stepped out of the shower and wrapped my hair up with a towel. The day was long and I was ready for it to be over but I still had to go to the bookstore for something I had to get for class.

"Bella!" my roommate called into the bathroom of our freshman dorm. I peeked my head around the corner to see her and she smiled. "Your computer is ringing. I think it's your Skype."

"Oh right!" I smiled, gathering all my things after slipping on my robe and walking to my room. I quickly put on some sweats and my university hoodie. I threw my hair up in a bun before sitting on my bed.

I smiled as I saw the missed call being from home. I immediately called back and waited for my mom to answer.

"Bella! Is that you? Oh goodness, baby. We've missed you. I miss you. Are you doing okay? Are you eating all right? How's your roommate? Your classes?"

"Honey… Honey… Slow down," my dad chuckled.

"James, I'm just worried about our baby girl. Let me ask her questions." My mom scowled at him. He rubbed her back gently before kissing her temple.

"I know. But she needs…" My dad chuckled, cutting her off with a small kiss.

"Calm. Please." He smiled down at her and she seemed to melt into his eyes.

"Okay." She said almost distantly.

I giggled at the display, breaking the trance they seemed to be in. My dad smiled at me, winking.

My mom just cleared her throat but her attitude towards the whole me being at school thing seemed to calm down considerably. "So… how's your roommate?" she asked with a soft smile. I smiled in return, looking over at said roommate and she smiled back.

"She's great. Couldn't have picked a better one myself. We're both Lit. majors so we have a lot of classes together. It's nice." I looked back at the computer to see my mom smiling with small tears in her eyes. "Mom?"

"I'm so sorry. You're just all grown up. It's hard. It seems just yesterday you were in diapers or you were begging me to read to you. Now you're off at college and studying those books you love so much. Oh dear god, Jamie." Her laugh was full of tears and she buried her face in my dad's shoulder. He rubbed her back and looked over at me with a smile over her head.

"We love you, Bella. She's just having a hard time with it all. You understand, right?" I smiled and nodded in response to his words. He blew me a kiss and I smiled, blowing him one in return.

"Later, Belly. We'll call you." I nodded as he shut the computer off. The image of my caring, loving parents in each other's embrace the last thing I saw.

"They okay?" my roommate asked as she sat down beside me on my bed. I shrugged in response, resting my head on her shoulder.

"Just the normal tough time of letting go. My mom is having a tough time but my dad is being strong for her. I can tell he's having trouble too though. He hasn't called me Belly since I was twelve," I chuckled.

"Aww, they miss you. It's normal. I wish my parents were like that. All they do is send money and gas cards." She shrugged and hopped off my bed.

"Yeah…" I mused. "I am lucky." I smiled to myself.

* * *

I walked the aisles, frustrated with myself and sighed. I couldn't find the book I needed for the seminar I had in a few hours. The professor said he would dock points for not having it.

"Dammit," I growled as I came up empty once again.

"Can I help you with something?" A voice chuckled from my right. I squealed and turned to see a boy with beautiful green eyes and straight up sex hair. I was in heaven to be honest.

"Umm…" I blushed and looked down at my feet. "I was looking for a book for Professor Clemmons seminar and he said he would…" I trailed off.

"He said he would dock points if you didn't have it. Yeah. I remember that class. I actually have the book. I took his seminar when I was a freshman. It's back at my dorm though." He smiled but it seemed crooked and almost familiar. I shook it off and nodded.

"That's cool but I need my own copy," I laughed softly.

"Oh, yeah. That's what I meant. You can have mine. This late in the semester the bookstore is sold out." He smiled. I smiled in return and nodded.

"Oh. That's really generous of you but I can't just take a book that had to have cost over a hundred dollars. That just doesn't feel right." I shook my head with a small smile.

"Ah. No. It's okay. I don't use it and if it makes you feel better we can say it's on loan? Yeah?" He smiled at me again, ducking his head to catch my eyes. I nodded and bit my lip nervously. His eyes zeroed in on my lip and he chuckled, running a hand through his hair.

"Okay. But like I said it's at my dorm and I have work for another hour. Can I meet you in the quad in say… hour and fifteen?" His smile was infectious and I nodded.

"Sounds good." I began to walk away when I heard his voice call after me.

"I'm Edward, by the way!" I turned to look at him and smiled.

"Bella… My name's Bella." I smiled softly and brushed my hair behind my ear.

"Nice to meet you… Bella," he said before he turned and got back to work. I smiled to myself as I exited the bookstore.

"Whoa," I whispered to myself.

* * *

I looked down at my watch and cursed myself. I was late to meet Edward to get the book I needed for my class in an hour. The line at lunch was too long and I didn't have any money to go to the café so I had to wait.

I turned the corner and stopped dead in my tracks as I realized there was a small crowd gathered around something. I couldn't figure out what it was but I didn't see Edward anywhere.

"Where is…" My jaw dropped as I heard someone singing. It was beautiful. It was accompanied by an acoustic melody and I could tell it was what the crowd was gathered around. The crowd, which I noticed, was mostly girls. All of them were swaying together. I laughed softly and moved closer to see.

"_Well open up your mind and see like me,_

_open up your plans and damn you're free._

_look into your heart and you'll find love love love love."_

I blinked to clear my vision but I could see that what I saw was in fact real. Edward was dressed in torn jeans with a black button up. He wore a black beanie on top of his head and Ray Ban sunglasses. He was sitting as he sang with all his heart to the song and strummed his guitar as if it was as easy as breathing.

"_This is our fate._

_I'm yours._

_Scooch on over closer, dear,_

_and I will nibble your ear."_

His eyes locked on mine and his crooked smile emerged as he continued to sing. The girls and even some guys that surrounded him were clapping along with the song. I smiled in return, blushing red and totally swooning.

* * *

"Hey, Bella." He smiled and put his guitar back in its case. I laughed softly, shaking my head.

"Wow… you have a beautiful voice." I moved closer to him as the crowd dispersed.

He shrugged, rubbing the back of his neck and chuckling, "Yeah. My dad's a singer… guess I got it from him."

"Cool…" I smiled and stood before him. He reached into his bag that lay beside him, pulling out the book I needed.

"That's what you need. Also everything is highlighted that was in the tests and quizzes so that should help you out too. His tests and quizzes never change so it should be helpful. Just make sure you look him in the eye as you answer a question in class. The man can smell fear." I laughed and nodded, taking the book from him.

"This is great. I can't thank you enough." I smiled shyly down at him. He shrugged again with a smile.

"Anything to help out another Lit. major. Plus you seemed really stressed looking for it so I'm glad to have helped," he smiled.

And I swooned.

"Yeah." I looked down at my watch and my eyes widened. "Fuck. I'm gonna be late. I'll talk to you later, Edward. Thanks again." He nodded and stuffed his hands into his pockets.

"No problem, Bella. Hope I see you again." I smiled and nodded at his statement.

"Me too, Edward."

* * *

The next day...

One of the girls in my class told me that I was crazy for paying NYSC for a gym membership a couple of blocks away when the school's gym was free for all students. So I took her advice and finally got my ass over there to sign up after my last morning class for the day.

Dad always worked out, he found the gym relaxing or something, and when I was old enough I got into it too. My dad was the coolest and I always wanted to do whatever he was doing, and thanks to him constantly going to the gym, I found myself to be fit and healthy well through my teen years.

I'd never been inside the fitness centre here at school, but it was really nice inside, all new and clean looking. There were a bunch of girls and a couple of guys running, cycling, and climbing and a whole group could be heard from the inside basketball courts. The weights section only had a couple of guys so I started there, and once I was done a good amount, one of the treadmills were free.

I'd brought my bikini along like I always did, enjoying a cool down swim after a workout. Something I also picked up from Dad. There were a couple of people doing laps and a big buff blonde lifeguard walking around. Dear god, he was hot. Smoking hot.

He gave me a big grin, his adorable dimples showing and making me smile back. I had the strangest sense that I'd seen him before. Maybe around campus? I shook my head at myself and undressed by one of the chairs, putting my towel and everything on there.

I tried not to smile as I could feel his eyes on me, and got into the pool, quickly making my way under and taking a big stroke. I swam around for a few minutes and looked up when I was towards the edge, big-blonde Mr. Dimples standing above me and offering another smile.

"Hey, how's the water?" he asked.

"It's great," I bit my lip and pushed my wet hair back.

"Yeah, looks real... hot from where I'm standing."

I laughed, thinking this guy just couldn't help himself. But it was working for him, not many guys could pull off the forward act. I wondered what was up with me lately. Edward yesterday, and this guy today. I'd never noticed the campus had so many attractive guys.

"It's actually kinda cool," I corrected.

"Well, I'm sure you know what I mean."

I laughed and made my way out. "Lifeguard, huh?" I asked.

He nodded, "Between and after classes, yeah... You new to the gym?"

I grabbed the towel and wrapped it around myself, "Yeah, actually. I'm sure I'll see you again." I gave another smile and turned towards him again, really noticing how bright his blue eyes were. He was really something else, a teddy bear and yet completely masculine all at once.

"Yeah?" He raised his eyes brows, "A lot more of each other, hopefully. You know what I mean, baby?" he winked.

I couldn't help but laugh. This guy was definitely not shy. "Okay, but I gotta go now. I'll see you later." I gave a small wave as I backed away and went for the exit.

"I'm Emmett by the way. I'll give you a free personal workout session, just ask for me."

"I'll be sure to do that, Emmett." I laughed, rolling my eyes but seriously considering it. "I'm Bella."

"Pleasure meeting you, beautiful," he managed to call after me before I left.

I smiled again and shook my head, walking to the girls showers. _Interesting,_ I thought. I really needed to just get back to the dorm and study. At the rate I was going there'd be another guy tomorrow.

* * *

"How the fuck am I meant to study for this exam when there's hardcore gay sex going on up there?" my roommate complained for the thousandth time.

I laughed and shrugged, "I think they're playing video games,"

"Okay... Stop it."

"What?" I defended, placing my textbook in my lap and giving her a stare.

"You meet two hot guys in less than two days and I haven't gotten laid in over three months. _And _I have to listen to this shit!" she said, completely frustrated and pointing to our ceiling.

I heard the same, "Yeah, take it, take it. You like that, bitch?" as I'd been hearing for over an hour.

My roommate was right, it was extremely distracting. "I'll go up, they're starting to piss me off anyway." I sighed as I got off my bed and pulled my hair tie out of my hair.

"What?" she asked, "Thinking about finding another hot guy up there?"

I laughed as I headed for our door, "Hey, plenty to go around... Or we can share," I winked, joking with her. "Be right back!"

I left our room and headed up stairs, doing the math to come to the room above ours. Plus the noise was a dead give away.

"Yeah, fuck, take it!"

_Yep, definitely the right room._

I knocked hard on the first go so they'd be able to hear, happy I didn't have to knock again when I heard footsteps and a male's voice saying he was coming.

The door swung open and I was taken aback when the tall lifeguard Emmett stood before me.

"Sup?" he asked, dimples back in play when he saw me, "Hey, Bella, I see you really did ask for me. Want that workout session now, babe?" he chuckled.

This was too strange. I frowned and shook it off, "Ah, no, you're just annoying my roommate with all the hardcore gay sex that you have going on up here."

"What?" he asked, clearly confused, his smile leaving him for a second.

"Her words, not mine."

"We're not fucking, baby. He's my fucking brother, I'm not into incest... but I would be if you were my sister, I'll tell you that." He raised his eyebrows up and down.

"Charming," I commented flatly. "Could you just please keep the gay incest fucking down? We're trying to study down there."

"I told you we were being too loud. Fucking video games don't need to be up this loud, and who the hell calls their brother a bitch anyway?" another voice came from behind the door, my eyes widening when it opened completely and Edward stood next to Emmett.

Sure, Emmett was more buff, they had different hair and eye color, but once standing next to each other you could sort of tell there was something not only similar, but also strangely familiar.

This shit could not get any weirder even if I tried to make it weirder. Of course the two hot guys were brothers. Of course this would happen to me.

"Hey, Bella," Edward smiled crookedly, charming in more of a proper way than his brother.

"You know her?" Emmett asked.

"We met a couple of days ago. Why, are you two friends?"

"Nah, we just met yesterday."

I sighed, looking between the two.

"Look, thanks for the book and thanks for..." I narrowed my eyes, wondering what to thank Emmett for, "um, watching me swim around yesterday... but please, just keep it down." I told them, turning to leave, ready to fucking bitch to my roommate about how the two guys were brothers.

"Hey, listen baby! I'm the older one, this little shit ain't got nothing on me."

"By two fucking minutes," I heard Edward respond to Emmett.

"Whatever," Emmett dismissed. "I know where you live, Bella."

I shook my head and laughed, thinking if I didn't have a way of making it stranger, Emmett definitely did.

"Way to be a fucking creep," Edward commented, the door slamming just as I headed down to my floor.

I ran the rest of the way, opening our door. "They're fucking brothers!"

"What?"

"Edward. Emmett. Brothers."

"Shit, I'll take one and you have the other. From the sounds of it Emmett seems like my type. I don't fucking need singing, I need action."

"Thanks for solving the problem, Rose, I'll be sure to introduce you guys," I said sarcastically, plopping down on the bed in disbelief.

"Relax, Bella. They're brothers, but it's not like they're _your_ brothers," Rose said.

"True..." I sighed, deep in thought now. Something just felt... off.

**The End.**


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